Yesterday morning I woke up around 7:30ish, picked my laptop off my bedroom floor, stumbled through the internet for around a half an hour, and then got up to take a shower.
This is where my story begins.
I ran out of shampoo a couple days ago and since then have rationing out the last few droplets to last me till I had the time to go buy more. Yesterday I got out every last bit of sud in that bottle. It was clean and clear and nothing more shall ever come out of it. I mean there is nothing in that bottle. I spent a solid 3 minutes getting shampoo out of that bottle (which is a long time to spend naked shaking a bottle furiously up and down to get another drop out so you may just have enough to get half your head clean).
Now things get really bad.
I continued to lather my last bit of shampoo, rub it all over my face, count to 30, rinse, realize in horror as to what I had just done, and cried.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Blood Drive Bitches
My school had a blood drive today. There was an assembly, flyers, sign up sheets everywhere! 'we need blood, 80% of people will use blood products at some point in their lives but only 4% donate.'
I took it upon myself to join that small percentage and donate my blood. Afterall, I'm of good health, I'm perfectly capable of doing so, and I'm a universal donor. So when the sign up sheet came around I put down my name and signed up for a spot during my study during last period next week.
Today was the blood drive. I was sitting on the steps outside a-block with some friends waiting for class to start when the principle came up to us.
"Are any of you interest in giving blood today?" he inquired.
My friends said they couldn't 'cause they had gotten piercing within the last 6 months and I said I was sign up to go during last period.
"All appointments after 2 o' clock have been cancelled. There weren't enough sign ups then to make it worth while. There's a bunch of free beds in there now if you'd like to do it still."
Wait, what? 'Weren't enough donors to make it worth while.'. What the he'll right? We get all these statistics thrown in our face about how there's a massive blood shortage out there. 'We need to get up and do our part'. But my blood which 'has the potential to save up to 3 lives wasn't worth staying open an extra 15 minutes for. Whatever though, I just went in then.
So to the auditorium I go. There's a good 8 empty beds, 2 people are being worked on an there's 3 people filling out applications. There's another 5 people ahead of me in line but overall the place looks pretty empty.
I walked up to the coordinator, explained how my appointment had been cancelled and asked to reschedule.
'Do you have an appointment?'
'Well, no, not anymore.'
'Sorry were booked, if you don't have an appointment you'll have to leave.'
'But I had an appointment, you guys cancelled on me. Is there not anytime I could come do it?'
'No, we're booked for the whole day.'
At this point another aid came over to help sort things out. From the looks of it there were two other kids who were stuck in the same situation as me as well as some others who wanted to sign up on the spot. No such luck. A whole group of us were told to leave immediately, they wouldn't take our blood.
In complete disbelief I left and went to class. I mean they spout off all these statistics about how desperate they are for blood but they can't be bothered sticking around an extra half hour for another 15 or so volunteers? I wasn't even given a pamphlet or card in case I was interested in signing up for a later date. Just told to piss of cause they didn't have the time.
Weren't even polite about it.
I took it upon myself to join that small percentage and donate my blood. Afterall, I'm of good health, I'm perfectly capable of doing so, and I'm a universal donor. So when the sign up sheet came around I put down my name and signed up for a spot during my study during last period next week.
Today was the blood drive. I was sitting on the steps outside a-block with some friends waiting for class to start when the principle came up to us.
"Are any of you interest in giving blood today?" he inquired.
My friends said they couldn't 'cause they had gotten piercing within the last 6 months and I said I was sign up to go during last period.
"All appointments after 2 o' clock have been cancelled. There weren't enough sign ups then to make it worth while. There's a bunch of free beds in there now if you'd like to do it still."
Wait, what? 'Weren't enough donors to make it worth while.'. What the he'll right? We get all these statistics thrown in our face about how there's a massive blood shortage out there. 'We need to get up and do our part'. But my blood which 'has the potential to save up to 3 lives wasn't worth staying open an extra 15 minutes for. Whatever though, I just went in then.
So to the auditorium I go. There's a good 8 empty beds, 2 people are being worked on an there's 3 people filling out applications. There's another 5 people ahead of me in line but overall the place looks pretty empty.
I walked up to the coordinator, explained how my appointment had been cancelled and asked to reschedule.
'Do you have an appointment?'
'Well, no, not anymore.'
'Sorry were booked, if you don't have an appointment you'll have to leave.'
'But I had an appointment, you guys cancelled on me. Is there not anytime I could come do it?'
'No, we're booked for the whole day.'
At this point another aid came over to help sort things out. From the looks of it there were two other kids who were stuck in the same situation as me as well as some others who wanted to sign up on the spot. No such luck. A whole group of us were told to leave immediately, they wouldn't take our blood.
In complete disbelief I left and went to class. I mean they spout off all these statistics about how desperate they are for blood but they can't be bothered sticking around an extra half hour for another 15 or so volunteers? I wasn't even given a pamphlet or card in case I was interested in signing up for a later date. Just told to piss of cause they didn't have the time.
Weren't even polite about it.
Only in New Zealand...
Can you buy a kiwi flavored condom. Here I am sorting through a newly purchased box of 'Durex Select Flavours' condoms when I stumbled upon the kiwi flavor. Sure there's the expected Banana, orange, and strawberry. But kiwi? Even came with a cool little picture for identification on the back. I'll be sure to let you know how realistic it actually is.
Monday, March 9, 2009
The email that was never sent.
To: Hannah Rand
Subject: I never really did know what to put here.
Message:
Subject: I never really did know what to put here.
Message:
So. I'm writing you again. Haha don't worry this isn't a creepy stalkerish one. I'm sure as so soon as you saw my name in your inbox you figured i'd just be flipping out, again. So I hope you open this, which I'm sure you will 'cause we're always curious about that kind of shit.
Basically, I'm not mad anymore. For whatever reason I just really needed to tell that to you. Make it official or something, I dunno. I'm just not upset. Or hurt. Or anything really. We had something special and I don't regret any of it. I wouldn't change a thing if I could. Not that I'm trying to say we should go the whole 'let's just be friends route', it ended pretty badly. My Bad. I mean, we were never 'just friends' we started our relationship boyfriend-girlfriend and it ended the same way. I'm not sure if we never were friends is we ever can be. But that's beside the point. What I really want to say is this; We had a great run, a bad fall, and there's no regrets to any of it.
We're good.
--------------------
And I'm going to respect your last request of me and not send this. Maybe you'll see it, maybe you won't. Just, take care and know that I understand now, and I'm okay. We're okay.
Basically, I'm not mad anymore. For whatever reason I just really needed to tell that to you. Make it official or something, I dunno. I'm just not upset. Or hurt. Or anything really. We had something special and I don't regret any of it. I wouldn't change a thing if I could. Not that I'm trying to say we should go the whole 'let's just be friends route', it ended pretty badly. My Bad. I mean, we were never 'just friends' we started our relationship boyfriend-girlfriend and it ended the same way. I'm not sure if we never were friends is we ever can be. But that's beside the point. What I really want to say is this; We had a great run, a bad fall, and there's no regrets to any of it.
We're good.
--------------------
And I'm going to respect your last request of me and not send this. Maybe you'll see it, maybe you won't. Just, take care and know that I understand now, and I'm okay. We're okay.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Some things you just don't share.
Today in Biology class my partner was out at a swimming competition. So I, in turn, attempted to talk with the other pair who I sat at the table. One of them told me he masturbated to Pink Floyd.
Not okay.
Not okay.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
My happiest childhood memory.
Now, I was an innocent child, much as I am today. I had this unfaltering trust, which in turn led to the incident of ’01. I was hanging out with my friend Josie. We were over at her house playing some games a little T.V., typical stuff. Mid bowl of chocolate syrup with ice cream Josie presented me with a dilemma of hers. (Note: if you were to talk to her about the following tale, she would say it was my idea; however, this is most surely not the case.) She told me about a clubhouse of hers across the street that she was incidentally locked out of. “Help me find a way to get in,” she had pleaded to me. I accepted the mission and we left the house to further survey the complication.
I recall looking upon a small, squat, grayish building in the middle of an unkempt yard. It was perfect. I needed to get into that fort; it was big enough for the lot of us, yet too small for the grownups to want to dominate, and with a small low-down window that was perfect for spying. Now, to find a way in…
After sufficiently establishing the door was, in fact, locked, we decided we should try to unlock it. The two of us ran back to the house to locate every key in sight. From car keys, to house keys, to diary keys, we had tried them all. It didn’t work.
So onto the next logical step: break in. I told Josie to take off her shoes and I’d take off mine, and we could just chuck them at the window. It was about this time that Josie’s little brother Cody came over to us, importuning to let him help us. And, as older siblings commonly do, we told him no, and to go away. We continued to chuck shoes at the window, soon switching to small rocks, which also didn’t work. After several more minutes of object-chucking, I located a large log-like branch. Hefting it off the ground with Josie’s help, we managed to bash it against the window, shattering it.
Right then, several key events happened. One, I decided I actually had no desire to break the window and quickly fled the scene. Two, Josie realized that this actually was not her clubhouse and she shouldn’t break into it, and also left. Third, upon stumbling upon the scene, Cody (who decided if we got to break a window, so should he) broke two more of the shed’s windows with a hammer. Finally, and probably most importantly, the neighbor who had witnessed the entire episode called the police and reported an armed break in.
I can now vividly recall being 8 years old playing with sidewalk chalk next to the garage and being swarmed by 4 cop cars (including my father, who was chief-of-police then). This prompted me to hide within the house, put on my most angelic face, and wait for the punishments to come.
Yes, I was punished; groundings, lectures, community service, extra chores. Yet… it’s still one of my most cherished memories. Why? Because it’s one of those memories, the ones that stick with you to the end, and whether good or bad, it’ll always remind you of what an idiot you used to be.
I recall looking upon a small, squat, grayish building in the middle of an unkempt yard. It was perfect. I needed to get into that fort; it was big enough for the lot of us, yet too small for the grownups to want to dominate, and with a small low-down window that was perfect for spying. Now, to find a way in…
After sufficiently establishing the door was, in fact, locked, we decided we should try to unlock it. The two of us ran back to the house to locate every key in sight. From car keys, to house keys, to diary keys, we had tried them all. It didn’t work.
So onto the next logical step: break in. I told Josie to take off her shoes and I’d take off mine, and we could just chuck them at the window. It was about this time that Josie’s little brother Cody came over to us, importuning to let him help us. And, as older siblings commonly do, we told him no, and to go away. We continued to chuck shoes at the window, soon switching to small rocks, which also didn’t work. After several more minutes of object-chucking, I located a large log-like branch. Hefting it off the ground with Josie’s help, we managed to bash it against the window, shattering it.
Right then, several key events happened. One, I decided I actually had no desire to break the window and quickly fled the scene. Two, Josie realized that this actually was not her clubhouse and she shouldn’t break into it, and also left. Third, upon stumbling upon the scene, Cody (who decided if we got to break a window, so should he) broke two more of the shed’s windows with a hammer. Finally, and probably most importantly, the neighbor who had witnessed the entire episode called the police and reported an armed break in.
I can now vividly recall being 8 years old playing with sidewalk chalk next to the garage and being swarmed by 4 cop cars (including my father, who was chief-of-police then). This prompted me to hide within the house, put on my most angelic face, and wait for the punishments to come.
Yes, I was punished; groundings, lectures, community service, extra chores. Yet… it’s still one of my most cherished memories. Why? Because it’s one of those memories, the ones that stick with you to the end, and whether good or bad, it’ll always remind you of what an idiot you used to be.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Shaker Fries and High Frequencies
Last Tuesday at work I served one of the happiest people I have met in my entire life. I mean it was truly remarkable how happy this lady was. She walked about to my counter big ol' grin on her face and placed an order for a double cheese burger combo. But she didn't just ask for it, it was like I could feel her burning desire for it. She said can I have it and I wanted to scream back at her 'Yes, you can!' Her jubilance grasped hold of inner being and I wanted nothing more then to serve her this burger. Then in this bid deep southern accent she excliamed to me 'wait, can I shake up my fires?!' and I burst out laughing right there in the middle of lunch rush. I mean she was so excited, so fucking excited to shake up her fries. I'm not sure if it's even possible to convey the pure rush of energy I got from this lady. But whatever it was that made her so happy, made me so happy. You should have heard the pure joy in those words. The rest of my day nothing could bring me down, I was simply to happy to worry about anything and wanted nothing more then to make everyone else around me to be happy too.
Have you ever heard the saying 'I just got a good vibe from him'? Well these vibes are the frequency at which the energy inside us is beating. Happy people beat at high frequencies and this happines transfers over to people and makes them happier in turn. Something to do with that whole elctromagnetic whatever the fuck in our brains. It just goes along with the whole Happiness is countagious theory. In turn however people who are sad or depressed beat at lower frequencies which can cause you too to beat slower and not live up to your happiness potential. We seak out those people who beat at a similar or matching frequency to our own. So if you're depressed you'll probably just find more depressed people. But! If you put a smile on and make positive choices then you're all that closer to finding happy people to surround yourself with.
Have you ever heard the saying 'I just got a good vibe from him'? Well these vibes are the frequency at which the energy inside us is beating. Happy people beat at high frequencies and this happines transfers over to people and makes them happier in turn. Something to do with that whole elctromagnetic whatever the fuck in our brains. It just goes along with the whole Happiness is countagious theory. In turn however people who are sad or depressed beat at lower frequencies which can cause you too to beat slower and not live up to your happiness potential. We seak out those people who beat at a similar or matching frequency to our own. So if you're depressed you'll probably just find more depressed people. But! If you put a smile on and make positive choices then you're all that closer to finding happy people to surround yourself with.
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